Asking Better Questions for Better Results – Episode 481

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[00:01] Welcome to the Prosperity Podcast. Prosperity thinkers, welcome to the podcast. This episode is about asking better questions, world-class questions, helping you to get more out of what you’re asking. And I’m sure as an advisor, you’ve seen this for decades and decades. When people come to you prepared, or at least with really good questions, you’re able to give them better answers. So let’s start on that foundation and then I’ve got a couple of specifics that we’re going to go over. Well, I’m so glad you brought it up. My own coach, Dan Sullivan of Strategic Coach has said for years that the quality of your questions will determine the direction that you’re going and generate the quality of answers that you get, et cetera.

[00:49] And so there’s a variety of questions that I love to use to get people started with. I think sometimes just asking what questions do you have? Because I find that people come to the phone calls usually with questions. And if we can get those burning questions handled right up front, it’s valuable to everybody. I love the question of, may I have permission to ask blunt questions? Because when I’m on with a brand new prospect that is interested in being a client of our firms, I’m asking income, net worth, how much do you have in your savings account? How much are you adding to your savings account every month? And those are obviously very blunt and private questions. And you know, to date, I don’t think I’ve had anybody say, no, I’m not okay with

[01:39] you asking blunt questions. You know, of course they can not answer it, but it’s pretty clear to them that I can give them better answers if I have good questions that come in. And then I’d love to share two questions that are my favorite that I use for so many things, personal business, workout, food, you name it. And the first is what’s working about that, you know, whatever the subject is. And the second is what’s not working. And I’ll give you a quick story. Just yesterday, I had the opportunity to sit with Todd’s grand niece, I believe is the proper family relation. This little girl is going into kindergarten today. Her first day at full day kindergarten and her mom and Todd were working on a

[02:30] project and it really, truly the most helpful thing that I could do at the time was to occupy this little girl. Not top on my list for a Sunday afternoon, however, I was there, she was there, and the other adults needed to be able to be focused on what they were working on. So we sat and played games and drew and ate and, you know, did all the things that you do. And one of the questions that I asked her, two of the questions more important, two of the questions that I asked her were, what are you most excited about kindergarten tomorrow? And what are you most afraid of about kindergarten tomorrow? And it was interesting, her answers and I think helpful to her, she didn’t actually have anything that she was afraid of, but I felt like, holy cow, you

[03:25] know, the, if you’ll allow me to say the queen of positive focus will acknowledge that sometimes dragging out the what are you afraid of or what’s not working aspect of a situation can help you find the good that is occurring there. That was really good. Did she shock you with her responses of how she was thinking and how she was taking in information? No, not so much. My mom was a kindergarten teacher, so. Oh, so you heard that then. Maybe, yeah, I’m not sure why I wasn’t shocked. You know, this is a very stable little girl in a great situation with lots of learning that’s already occurred in pre-K and with her parents. And she had mentioned that she was a little nervous meeting the teacher,

[04:15] which happened last week, I guess, sometime. So I was kind of thinking that I would hear a little bit more about that, but she was excited about seeing some of her friends and really in a go-forward way. And, you know, don’t you just love the resilience of children? They really provide a good example for us. Absolutely. So you mentioned Dan Sullivan, and I fully agree. He’s one of the best question askers alive. He really takes the time to think about something that makes you scratch your head at times and go, OK, I like the way he’s thinking of this. What is an approach that you take? You know, in October, you have a team retreat. And as a group, you’re a leader, you’re inspiring them. What are some of the questions that you’re asking yourself to help prepare?

[05:05] Well, without a doubt, the what’s working and what’s not working question is forefront in my mind, because in a business, you have systems. Some of them are working, some of them are not. So I will be using that. And then the other thing that I want to focus on, because our team is all virtual. So we have on-site meetings, not off-site, is the strength that each person brings to the table, and I really want to look to elevate that strength. So I’m asking myself questions, what activities or exercises could we do to bring up and up level and point out the strengths that would also allow us to tackle some of the areas that are not working, some of which are systems related and some of which are human being related.

[05:58] And so those are the questions that I’m asking myself. And then there’s a follow up one, and that is, how can we make it fun? Which is not an easy thing for me, because I’m a pretty like, this is the work that we need to do, roll up your sleeves and get it done kind of person. Nevertheless, with gamification, we know, I mean, science has proven that the results can be better if some type of fun is included, and we are going to be together for two and a half days and everybody stays here at the home. And so, you know, there’s lots of time. We can absolutely make time for a game to occur, and maybe there will just be a game for game’s sake, maybe there will be some type of way that we can gamify

[06:43] the generation of answers, the generating of answers to the questions that I have to make it land more appropriately, stick more clearly and be implemented more accurately when the team heads back to their offices. Yeah, and I think the first, you know, setting up and understanding that it really is a game, the way that you’re playing this and you’re practicing and some of the questions or some of the ways that you approach may not work, and that’s fine. And I look at the way that I ask questions and this episode, I put together a few notes of things. One is, you know, for us to be a lot more simple in the way that we ask questions. Sometimes we can overcomplicate it. Another tip that I’ve found is to use silence when we ask questions.

[07:41] So when you’re talking with others, allow the room to breathe. And sometimes that’s when really good stuff comes up. The other thing that I do when I’m asking questions for myself is I like to play pretend. So I’ll say, OK, well, you know, if I were, you know, and I’ll say something of the nature, like, OK, if I were 85 years old and I’m now looking back at this circumstance, what would I be proud of? Or, you know, I’ll adjust it accordingly. And I think too often as adults, we can be too practical, wanting to just solve the problem rather than play pretend. So your advice on what’s working, what’s not working, and us maybe having fun with it, those are those are three pretty good ways. Do you have any parting advice on the question side of things for clients

[08:40] so that they can do better with their finances? Yes, I think the question around liquidity and cash is always so critical, and it just does not get asked often enough. Everybody wants to jump to investments. And yet cash and liquidity creates emergencies that can be solved, opportunities that can be taken advantage of, peace of mind at night, and is so, so valuable. And as a society, we just don’t focus on it. So where you store your cash is a good question. How much cash do you have is a good question. How much are you adding to it is a good question. I think all of that space needs to be elevated in the realm of personal finance and the questions that go with it. Yes, yes, absolutely. With that, I have one quote that I heard recently,

[09:36] you tied it in perfect, Kim, which is, revenue is vanity, profit is sanity, cash is reality. Ah, that is good. And I thought, yeah, so when you just tied that in, thinking in that framework, it’s like, OK, you can have questions and conversations around the revenue. And often we’ll hear people in business and they’ll have questions around the other things that are just vanity. And then you can get into profit. And, you know, depending on how you do your accounting and whatever the numbers are, you can look puffed up or you can look like things are just horrible. But as you always mentioned, cash. And you’re teaching people to save. You’re teaching people to have these disciplines and these habits

[10:22] and to go off of cash flow. And so that, we’ll call it the Kim bridge right there. You’re just like, no, we’re going blunt. We’re going right here. And so I really enjoy that, Kim. Thank you. Always a joy and questions are such a good way to get results. And I want to share one more as we’re wrapping up. And it is, what are you building these days? Because everybody that’s moving forward is building something. And so I love that. And that actually came from Donald Miller in his new book, Hero on a Mission. What are you building? Ooh, I like it. I wrote it down. I’m going to use that one. Thank you, Kim. For any of you listeners, if you do have specific questions, please send those to helloatprosperitythinkers.com

[11:10] for your financial questions. Because you can read books, you can listen to podcasts, you can read blog posts, and you can get some of those questions answered. But truly to like get to the heart of it and to really move forward, that’s where having a consultation or just getting together with someone really makes a difference. And if you go to prosperitythinkers.com, there’s a direct way for you to take action and do that. And I highly encourage it to sometimes, yes, we just need to get out of our heads and have that real conversation. So Kim, thank you for spending your time and educating us today. Always a joy, Spencer. Thank you. Thank you for listening to the Prosperity Podcast. To take control of your money

[11:59] and have it work for you, visit prosperitythinkers.com.