Negotiation Hacks – Episode 285

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[00:01] Welcome to the Prosperity Podcast. Hello, listeners, and welcome to another episode of the Prosperity Podcast. Today, Kim and I are going to be taking a community question. And this community question is something that will get our minds turning. And it’s talking about negotiation hacks and things that you can do to better your career and your life. So, Kim, are you there with me? Absolutely. Well, wonderful. So, let’s cover this negotiation hack. And I’m first going to give you an example. So, in the community, they were asking, what are some negotiation hacks that I can use to get better prices on the things that I purchase and get a better salary? And here is what one of the top people in the community said. And they said, first, what you need to do

[00:56] is you need to reveal that you can be persuaded. Now, that sounds strange, what I thought, until I dived into it. So, here’s what you’re going to do. They said, that’s my offer. Of course, I’m very persuadable if I can understand how your offer is in my best interest. I thought that was interesting to kind of show your cards. So, for you, Kim, what are some negotiation hacks, some things that you suggest for our listeners? My biggest one is silence. If I’m ever negotiating with anybody, I just put my offer or my next offer on the table and then be quiet. And I think it’s a very valuable tool. And it really works well, not in a, what’s the word I’m looking for, not in a manipulative fashion at all, but it just works well in conversations. People just

[01:54] sometimes need a minute to think about what they’re saying or what they’re going to say. And way too often, we get emotional about stuff and so we’re just more constantly not listening carefully and then we’re also not just thinking a little bit before we speak. Now, believe me, I am a queen of no filter and thinking last and speaking first. However, when the chips are down or the relationship is serious or I need somebody to get results or whatever, I find that silence is a very, very valuable tool. Absolutely. So, do you have an example you can share with us when you were on one side or the other side of the negotiation that you were trying to figure out what would be best for both parties? Yeah, it’s interesting. Unfortunately, actually just a year or so ago in dealing with,

[02:50] I guess you could say an ex-family member, which is obvious then it’s an ex-husband, right? Okay. So, because generally you don’t just ex your family members. Yeah. There was a time when we had to finalize something, even though the divorce was many, many, many years ago. And I literally just sat on the couch. I sat with the dog. I kept my values in front of me, literally like on a piece of paper. I had my values in front of me and it enabled me to make careful consideration very quickly about what was most important to me and enabled me to make some concessions in that negotiation. And then of course, I also got some concessions by being crystal clear what was most important to me as the results of that negotiation. And somebody could say, oh, well, it didn’t work

[03:47] out as good for you financially. Well, who’s to judge? Only I can say what my values are and how I know without a shadow of a doubt that I spent money based on my values. Oh, Kim, that’s a really good question. A really good example. So I have one question for you. How did you sleep that night? Fabulously. Yeah, that’s a great question because the money is always make moreable. You know, the money is secondary without a doubt. What was important is aligning with values, making sure that the kids were where they needed to be, making sure that the relationship, though clearly separated, was the best that it could be. That’s way more important than the money. Absolutely it is. You know, it’s wonderful first for you to take the time to put your

[04:40] guard down and tell us this story. But you also realize that your values, that was a non-negotiable part of the transaction. Yep. And I have really benefited from having a list of values literally that I carry around with me all the time. And what I did is I took, I don’t remember, you know, 50 or so, like just a list of values off the website, narrowed it down to 20, narrowed it down again to 15 or even 12. And, you know, values change, but I just keep them in front of me and they help me make decisions. That’s wonderful. So when a person’s thinking of negotiating, you know, we hear, let the other person know that you’re persuadable, to use silence. Often the negotiation tactic that you hear is let the other person make the first offer. I mean,

[05:33] there’s a litany of different types of negotiation tips and tactics, but I think there’s maybe a different conversation we should be having this related. And there are certain things that we shouldn’t be negotiating on or price. And I was thinking the things that protect us. So like, I would not want to negotiate and get the lowest price to have a bad health insurance policy or car insurance or life insurance policy. What do you think? You know, it is very interesting. Way too often we vote price instead of value or reward or benefit. And again, being clear on your values, I think helps you be clear that there are some things that cheaper or less expensive even is not the best route. And, you know,

[06:23] the old adage of you get what you pay for. In many, many cases, that’s completely fine. You know, I think of the new fast fashion industry where they’re literally making these awesome clothes that are not made to hold up. Like they’re made to be worn three or four or five times, you know, taken to the dry cleaners twice and then gotten rid of because the seams and the fabric, et cetera, is not going to hold up. But, you know, you bought this awesome outfit. Well, okay, you know, no judgment. And that could really, really work for some people. And especially, you know, maybe for trendy clothes or whatever, that’s the perfect way to go about it so that you’re not caught wearing bell bottoms, which I think

[07:01] are back in style or maybe those yesterday. I’m not sure. So when we have our values clear and we want to especially enable ourselves to let the long term picture run the day, then it’s way easier to spend money on things that will benefit us long term. So to continue with the clothing analogy, you know, maybe it’s this awesome jacket that you buy that you absolutely want to spend more money on because, you know, it’s very timeless and you could work with it forever. You do not want to go cheap on something like that. Maybe it’s a mattress that is going to enable you to get really good sleep. You do not want to go cheap on that. Maybe it is life insurance, like you mentioned, that is the only kind of life insurance that has a guaranteed event attached to it,

[07:53] right? Last time I checked, death is not a negotiable thing. It’s not a way to go cheap. Now, it’s completely fine to do both. In other words, you might go cheap term insurance and then the more expensive whole life insurance because in this case, expensive in quotes is what is valuable. And so this is definitely something that people maybe want to spend a little time thinking about aligning their purchases with their own values, getting clear that things that last their entire life should be purchased differently than things that are for the short term. Absolutely. So as you were talking about that, you were talking about the difference of price, the difference of cost and the difference of value. Maybe you can break those

[08:41] down so that all of us can become better negotiators and be focusing on the things that are most important. Yeah, it’s a really good question. And without trying to get into dictionary definitions, I think that price is most oftenly associated with the literal printed piece of paper on the sticker. Like, you know, what is the surface level dollar figure that this thing is going to remove from my wallet in order to get it into my shopping cart or whatever it is. And so that’s what price is to me. Cost is a little bit bigger perspective, a little bit bigger of a picture. And so as an example, back to the clothing analogy, the price of a fast fashion dress is whatever it is, 20 bucks. And the cost you could say, well,

[09:38] if you’re having to buy that dress every single year, then there is an opportunity cost associated with that. You have other things around just the 20 bucks. You have your time. You have maybe accessories that you bought to go with it or what have you. I have to admit, I’m not an experienced fast fashion person, so I’m kind of winging it here. But it is something, the cost again, is something that has some ancillary pieces outside of the obvious dollar figure. And opportunity cost is a big one. And not that we want to apply opportunity cost to everything. You’re not going to eat a hamburger and think, oh, this $5 or this $10 could have been spent on an investment or something. You don’t want to get

[10:19] too carried away with the idea of cost. And yet cost does involve other things outside of the obvious equation, most often in the form of opportunity cost, in that it could impact your time or your health or your outlook or other aspects that are not hardwired into the price of the item. And sometimes they’re very obvious things and sometimes they’re not so obvious things, which then leads us to value, which is an even bigger perspective because I was using the term values as in like my own personal values as a person. And yet here we are using the term value as an example of that overall demonstration of the both underlying and overlying value of that item in your life. So we make a decision around value

[11:16] third. In other words, we typically go see the price, then we have to understand the cost, which might include opportunity cost. And then we take a look at the value, what it does for us. And something that I’m encouraging people to do is to switch those around. And if you get clear on your value and what you want the thing to do for you, then you can make a better decision about cost, which then can drive a more final decision about price. And again, I reiterate, sometimes it’s totally fine to buy the $20 fast fashion thing or the cheap term insurance. Sometimes it’s more appropriate to buy the classic timeless clothing item and or the classic timeless whole life insurance. I’m actually really liking this

[11:58] analogy here. I think it plays out pretty well. Yeah, it actually does. I think our listeners are going to look at this and say, oh, I finally get it. This makes sense. Well, I’m grateful because opportunity cost and using values to make purchasing decisions are definitely not talked about in your basic budgeting, how to handle your finances blog post. Yes. So what of the books that you’ve written? What book do you suggest our listeners could dive deeper into that’s going to go beyond cost and price and value? Oh, the best one for sure is financial planning has failed. And this one is not available on Amazon. The only way that you can get it is go to partnersforprosperity.com slash ebook forward slash ebook. So again, that’s partners number four prosperity.com

[12:47] forward slash ebook. And you sign up for our prosperity accelerator pack and get it’s about a 80 or 90 page book. I mean, we’ll definitely upgrade it to an Amazon book at some point. But what’s super cool about financial planning has failed is it has a lot of examples of capability around the monetary aspect of cost and price and value. Well, then that fits in perfect with this episode. I love it. Great. Glad to be of help. Well, listeners, you can go and grab that book on the website partnersforprosperity.com forward slash ebook. And you can also send your questions to Kim at hello at partnersforprosperity.com. Thank you for listening to the Prosperity Podcast. To take control of your money and

[13:40] have it work for you, visit us at partnersforprosperity.com. If you liked this episode, make sure you subscribe and leave a review.