Collaborate, Don’t Compete – Episode 522   

This transcript was auto-generated and may contain errors.

[00:01] Welcome to the Prosperity Podcast. Prosperity thinkers, we’re going to share a different approach to doing business and doing life that will no longer make it a winner and loser game. In fact, this new approach will make it so everyone wins at a much bigger game. What does that look like, Kim? Well, you know, that is win times three, where the person coming to the deal that was a winner and the person coming to a deal that thought they might be as loser and whoever is in the middle or on the outside that get the benefits of those two coming together with prosperity thinking is also a winner. And so that’s win times three. And I think if you need another name for that, it’s called collaborate, don’t compete.

[01:00] And this is something also that we have talked about on the podcast in the past because Dan Sullivan put this kind of thinking in my head really eons ago, but he put it in there really solidly, maybe a couple years ago. And so I’ve often had that mentality, right? Give first, you know, share, open up. It’ll be fine. There will be good opportunity. There will be a win times three, go givers, you know, life gives to the givers, takes from the takers, you know, there’s a bunch of different ways that you can look at it. But I have a very specific example that I think will help point this out. So many of you enjoy the internet as it relates to learning about whole life insurance and have run across a variety of people that I have been in touch with and could be competitors,

[01:55] but instead are collaborators. So Patrick Donahoe is one of them. Many, many of you were introduced to our community from the Palm Beach letter and Patrick is technically a competitor. I would never ever view him that way. However, I view him as a collaborator and we’ve gone on to create a third thing called the Prosperity Economics Movement that Todd Langford and I started, but Patrick has joined in on and it has some elements more for advisors. Nevertheless, for our listening community here, it’s been a very valuable tool and it publishes our books and does other things like that. There’s another one that’s very well known out in the marketplace and his name is Caleb Gilliams and he was trained by Todd Langford at Truth Training, enjoyed our

[02:40] material for a long time and has created an amazing community. Again, could absolutely be considered a competitor and yet I would never look at him that way. He’s a collaborator. And so he has an event for advisors that Todd and I went to this last weekend and it’s called the And Asset and it was a fabulous mastermind and there were amazing speakers there and there were an opportunity for us, Todd and I, to share the good that we’re doing. And so what I want our community to take home from that is, again, Caleb could be looked at as a direct competitor, but instead, not only was I willing to go to the event, I was very willing to be open and sharing with everybody there, all advisors, many of whom are also on the internet

[03:36] with books doing good things. In fact, when we walked in, there was a book on the chair of each person’s seat there in the conference room called Permission to Spend. Well, we’ve had a permission to spend report for eons. Nevertheless, I didn’t invent that idea. I don’t own that idea any more than I own any ideas. And yet, in a way, I do own the idea because I work with it. And I want you to own the idea, too. So Permission to Spend is the book. We can have this in the show notes as well by Tom Wall, who I didn’t even know, who’s done an amazing job of sharing the same ideas that we have in our Permission to Spend report, in his Permission to Spend book. And the book arena is really interesting because you can trademark

[04:33] and copyright, do all kinds of fancy things, but in books, you can literally have two books with the same title, they’ll have different authors, they may have different subtitles, et cetera. But the book realm is kind of interesting in that space. And I don’t view that as a bad thing because, well, first of all, there are subtitles and the content of the book, of course, is going to be different, and I have read Tom’s book and it is spot on with the same kind of thinking that we think about. So I just really know that I want to encourage everybody and Spencer, I’m sure you’ve got some great stories about collaborating, not competing as well, but I really want to encourage the prosperity thinking lens around

[05:18] collaboration and looking at people that you might tend to want to look at as competitors in a whole new way. Absolutely. You know, I feel like when we look at competitors and it’s an us versus them, there can be a healthy approach to take that, we’ll say. And I’m going to use the framework of a lot of people that grew up in the sports background. Maybe you played on high school sports, collegiate sports, or professional. They like the competitive nature to be able to say, okay, we won. But the best athletes out there, they’re not just competitive, but they’re collaborative. And so that reminds me, I am going to name drop, but it was a really interesting conversation I had and a good dinner.

[06:13] And so I’m not named dropping just to name drop, but I had a dinner with Del Murphy and his wife a while back. Del Murphy was a professional baseball player for a number of years. And it was really interesting. One, the most interesting part of the conversation and the one party that was the most interesting to talk with at the table was his wife. Blew me away. Like, what a classy, amazing woman. Absolutely. Just, she helped that family. She was the master collaborator. But when I was talking with Del, I remember hearing that, you know, he went through this bumpy period of trying to find himself and it was very competitive until he switched the lens to being collaborative of working with the team and it actually changed the role that he was playing on the team.

[07:08] Because it was no longer, I’m trying to become the very best of this. It was switching to what can is best for the team. What are my habits? What am I going to dedicate myself to? And then his career totally broke out. That was amazing to me and seeing his wife the whole time, just smile. And you could tell like she knew it the whole time. And she just pushed along and then helped the family grow. That was the best of collaboration. That is so cool. Well, it really is a unique perspective. And what’s awesome is that competition is fabulous. We get amazing things because of competition, because it causes each environment to be better, whatever it is, teams, businesses, departments inside the business, whatever, however you want to look at

[07:59] it, even amongst family members, competition for serving or, you know, creating good in the family or whatever it is. And so I’m not knocking competition at all. In fact, I was heavily involved in all kinds of sports growing up. I remember being very, very involved also in 4-H and winning ribbons at the fairs for cows and pigs and sheep and that kind of thing. And also at the same time being best friends with whether it was kids on the other team or 4-H members in another club or what have you. And so competition is good. It causes us to get better and we want to collaborate. We want to learn from each other. We want to be open-minded. We want to give, I’ve got an image in my head of a picture that

[08:52] I saw of a Afghan girl that was playing soccer and her head scarf came off and it was very distraught environment for her and the other team members surrounded her so that she could put that back on in privacy. I thought that was so cool and such a great example of we’re all human and we’re here on this earth to serve and to be served. And while competition can help us get better, we need to also collaborate and understand that there are times for both. Absolutely. You know, I’m going to use one example and then ask you a question. So the example is this, imagine the Beatles and if John never collaborated with Paul, what would their music sound like? You know, we saw what it was like after they broke up.

[09:50] Like they weren’t spinning out hits. It just wasn’t there. They had that team. So I’m going to ask you, you had this weekend of spending time with these other advisors and on paper, it would look like competitor. Right. But in life, it’s collaborator. So the first question is, how does this affect you moving forward? How are you going to approach the work that you do now that you’ve had this weekend with your collaborator slash competitors? Well, the best thing is, is I got some amazing ideas to help our clients and the next best thing is I know number one, that I can’t serve everybody, I need the help of those competitor collaborators and number two, I’m not for everybody. There are people that are going to resonate with person A, B, C, D,

[10:51] E, and F better than they resonate with me and I resonate better with people sometimes than they would resonate with person A, B, C, D, E, or F. And so one of the biggest messages that I want to take home for myself, and I actually said this at some point in the event, encourage others to think about it as well, is to continue to be myself and to learn from them and do some amazing things so that I can serve my clients better in the way that I work and that I’m even clearer on so that I can help new potentials know whether I’m the best person to serve them or somebody else is, because if I’m clear on, then it makes it easier for others to make that decision as well. Absolutely. I’m going to follow up with a two-step question.

[11:55] So the first part of this, I know you’re going to be uncomfortable with, and that’s cool because we’ll go through it. And then the second one, you’ll have to think for a moment, but I think the answer will come really fast. So the first is, now that you had the weekend with your collaborators and competitors, they probably said something to you. There was probably a conversation of gratitude or whatever that looks like. I say that’s uncomfortable because I know you, you don’t want to talk about that because you’re like, no, let’s just get to work. Let’s just do this. Like you’re onto the next good idea and the helping and doing this. But I want to take a moment and just kind of, maybe you can express

[12:36] in a few words of what that gratitude or what they were saying about you and Todd. Yes. And next time you and I are physically together, I’m going to punch you for bringing this up. Yeah. So it was so honorable, so amazing. There were about 15 speakers at the event and at least three fourths of them said, Kim and Todd have had a major impact on my career as a part of their speech. And it was so gratifying to meet a few people that said, Oh my gosh, you’re Kim Butler, I’ve been fill in the blank, reading your books, watching your podcasts, listening to your things for years and years and years. And so it was a very joy filled time because we were really there to give and to serve and I wasn’t speaking.

[13:40] I had no part other than attending. And I’m a big believer that when you go to an event like that, you try to go early, you try to stay late, you try to stay in the room the whole time so that you can continue to give and receive and the thing about receiving is interesting because if we don’t allow receipt, it shuts off somebody else’s give. And so with all humility, I got to sit there and listen to a lot of people that had been impacted by our books and our podcasts and our videos. And I am just super grateful for that. So punch you, but thank you for bringing it up. Good, good. I’m glad. So the next part of this question will take a little bit of reflection, but I know you’ll have a pretty fast answer.

[14:36] I want you to picture a couple of clients that you have brought in that maybe have now become collaborators, could be a business collaborator, or it could be idea collaborator and express some general gratitude to that because we now started and we use the framework of competitor collaborator, we saw what it was like to receive, and now we’re going to show what it’s like to give. And explain. So I actually have three right off the bat. So you, so Spencer Shaw at Podkick.com, the best podcast co-host ever. I’m always grateful for you and the work that you do and the good that you bring to our prosperity thinkers community, and really just share every kudos about the podcast with you, for you, for our community,

[15:29] because I know how much they benefit from you as well as me, which is awesome. The second one is Chris, who was a amazing collaborator just a couple weeks ago in an environment where I needed some help and he stepped up to the plate and the things that he had to say and the value that he brought to the conversation was amazing. And then the third one is Jimmy, who gave me such honor and has interestingly enough Spencer not only helped me, but he’s helped another one of our clients. And so how cool is that? We got to pair a couple clients together where Jimmy was so helpful. And yes, Teresa and I coordinated the environment, but Jimmy’s the one that stepped up and helped that client in a way.

[16:27] And I don’t know that that client knows who Jimmy is, but I know who Jimmy is. Oh, I love it. Okay. So I have a unique call to action for this episode and I would do a drum roll, but then the microphone would get all weird and stuff like that. So here we go. One thing that is apparent is that the way that you are living life is very intentional and you have created your ecosystem, which includes the people around you, the competitors, collaborators around you, the support people, the team members, the clients and all of that. And so what that means is as a listener, if you’re hearing this and it put a smile on your face, you’re saying, yeah, this is, this is my team, this is my group. If you are needing to collaborate, you have a problem to solve, or maybe

[17:21] you’ve just got some gratitude and you say, Hey, I can offer this or whatever it is, send an email to hello at prosperitythinkers.com. So again, if you are trying to solve some type of problem or you’re good with something, whatever that is, let us know that’s a dedicated email just for the podcast. And the reason I say that is because like-minded people are in this group and now we can make connections and it’s going to benefit everyone. Everyone wins at that point. I love that. And I want to add to that thought because we are working on figuring out what a prosperity thinkers community might look like. And so we’ve got our prosperity pledge membership and we’re deciding if it would be appropriate within that membership to connect

[18:14] one member to another. We tried to do that when the internet first came about, I think Yahoo groups was the first thing, like even before Facebook existed. And we didn’t do a good job of it and consequently it failed, but that’s just learning. So I would love some feedback. Like if you’re a prosperity pledge member, would you be interested in collaborating, connecting with other clients of ours across the states? I love it. That is so good. Kim, thank you for bringing this lesson to light. I think for all of us, one, we get to relish a little bit and how uncomfortable you were. That was kind of cool, but it was, it was great because it was honed in on a lot of gratitude. And for me, this throws another stake in the ground of saying, this

[19:00] is a place of people that think and act like me, and I want more of that. And I hope for all of you listeners that that stake just got pounded in the ground a little bit deeper and we’re here to support send that email to hello at prosperity thinkers.com. Thank you for listening to the prosperity podcast to take control of your money and have it work for you. Visit prosperity thinkers.com.